lowest.

hello, old friend.
i am sad again.

give me your forever, not a day less will do from you.

why do i feel so sentimental all the time?

does everyone else feeel this too? FUCK. i want to curl up in a little ball and suffocate the small, living, breathing creature inside of my chest. it is a parasite, and it feeds on my sanity.

rush. that word feels like what it sounds like.
rushhh.

i rush toward you.

i am ready to owe you anything.
FUCK.

rkeawgvnj;aerbvLKAWSNEVq'kwe

this is so fucking shitty. i waaaant yooooou.

i gave me away.

tonight was simply splendid. he's beautiful, he's sentimental, his voice is like (and yes, i know i sound like bella from twilight, but screw it) velvet.

i like him, i like him, i like him.

i want to hold his hand all the time.
i like his smile, and i like his teeth. and his lips. and his skin.

fuck this:



and fuck you.















i want this:



wait, is that a girl? i think i see a little bit of a boob there.
oh well. i still kinda want that too, so.
i still kinda want you.



you know i'd wait forever, if i had time to, but i don't have forever to wait for you.

so every second song still reminds me of you, when are they going to start reminding me of him? thiiis iiis taaakiiing tooo looong.

kiss me. i totally dont have the guts.

she's just so mmm.

it's so cold.

i miss the feel of your skin on mine, and i miss how your eyes burn. i miss that moment when i see your face light up and your lips part, showing your teeth. your tongue.

she's got it all figured out, she knows what everything's about.

i'm all alone at home, everybody has left. the moment the door shuts behind the last person leaving must be the most disappointing moment ever. for just a fleeting space of time, your heart sinks to your tippy toes and you realize you now have to face the dark on your own. lonelily.

if you would only listen, you might just realize what you're missing; you're missing me.

if we want hell, then hell is what we'll have.

i want to watch the moon rise with you. i want to see the gloomy, dim rays light up your eyes. i like to see their blaze.

please.please.please
make this go away

daylight

blue lips, blue veins.

i don't even know anymore, my mind is spinning. i don't want to think about it.

she's such a charmer, oh no.
i want you to be crazy 'cause you're boring, baby, when you're straight.
hello, world. i'm your wild girl.
so, come on, flash, all my ladies.

i like a BOY.

b.i.t.c.hes on my d_ck like this.

grab my crotch, wear my hat low like you.

red lipstick.

she bats her eyelashes.

her pallid skin.

i want to see her smile.

fuck.

i tried to change this, but i can't. it's not just something i can stop, like smoking or drinking. it's there all the time.

and that's kind of okay :)