i was just enjoying a decadent plum when, to my extreme displeasure, i came across half a cluster of brown worm eggs embedded in my snack. i recovered the lost half, semi-chewed, inside of my mouth.
i am nautious and i don't what the shit to do about the fact that there are a few stranded worm eggs inside of my mouth.
i am going to go with drinking piping hot coffee. it's scalding my mouth but who cares.
die, fucking worm eggs, die.
i've been a complete emotional wreck this entire week. i was unimaginable, i was out of control. i was laughing hysterically, and then i was on the floor of the shower, and just for the record, crying in the shower is not as fun as every bumper sticker or typograph on weheartit.com says it is. it sucks.
i haven't stared at a pair of scissors like i did this week in a very, very long time. we're talking years here.
i also haven't felt so reckless and directionless in a very long time. i feel helpless and i am lost for words. for lack of a better word, i am screwed.
"everybody has three lives; a public life, a private life, and a secret life."
i think my problem is that my secret life is seeping through my private life and into my public life. to pretend is not an option anymore, i struggle to secure the mask on my face everytime i see someone, anyone.
being alone only lures out the demons. not childhood demons from the past, those are successfully suppressed. my demons are from my present, my everyday life. they lurk.
but whatever, life's like that when you're a moody teenager. an overly emotional teenager. a moody, over-the-top emotional teenager who analyzes almost every single miniscule detail until you pass out from sheer exhaustion. when you're so very tired that you can't think straight. but you can't stop.
i'm pretty much tired of being in love with you